52: Stranger on A Train
Sun, Jun 11, 2006 01:21 Mor

Hi everybody. Tis I, its Lance. I'm in my home town of Providence right now, where we just finished a killer set at Summer Slam, with USAIsAMonster and Manbeard backing me up. It was rules.

Anyhoo, just a quick note, nothing more, to those of you in, or familiar with people around, the LA area: PICK UP SOME MILK. Oh, and, see you Wednesday. I'll be playing The Cocaine this Wednesday, the 14th at Live Jazz, in Downtown. Address = 366 E 2nd Street. Other bands = Obsolete Heart, Tek Support, Wolf Gang Bang. And it looks like the cover will be $5. Ah, looking forward to tacos.

So, I'll be on a train the next few days. I would like to present to you, now, while I'm gone, something I've been playing with. I've been thinking about a book called "101 September 11th Jokes." It is based on the book "101 Elephant Jokes," compiled by Robert Blake. Please don't call me a heartless bastard.
Anyhoo, these are the september 11th jokes I've come up with so far. Please let me know if you know any more.

Q. What do you get when you cross an airplane and a sky scraper?
A. Ground Zero.

Q: Whats the difference between George W. Bush and Osama Bin Laden?
A: Nothing.

Osama Bin Laden walks into a bar, says to the bar tender, "I'll Have A Manhattan."

Q: What's grey and powdery?
A: The victims of September 11th.

A pilot walks into a bar, says to the bartender "Help!! My plane has been hijacked!"

Q: What's the difference between a hijacked plane on September 11th and an NYC Taxi cab?
A: 30,000 ft.

I just flew into the world trade center, and boy are my arms over there.

Q: What's the biggest tragedy of September 11th?
A: They just had the windows washed.
A: They had had just finished paying off the mortgage.
A: George Bush will never find out how "My Pet Goat" ended.

Q: What did Robert De Niro in Taxi Driver do when he found out there was a plane full of pimps??
A: He hijacked it and flew it into the world trade center.

World trade center walks into a bar, bar tender says "No Smoking."

World trade center walks ino a bar, bartender says "What do you want?" "Ah, I'll just have a water."

Airplane crashes into a bar... ah, i dunno.

Anyhoo, please write back some time, and I hope to see you soon.

I miss you.

The Billionth Man To Walk On The Moon,
Lance Romañce

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