209: Lance's Generic Obsenities
11/26/01 8:40 PM
Another mailing list??? So fast?? Yep, thats right. But just a quick one.

When I was 10 years old, my family went to Diney World, and visited the MGM Studios Park. They regularly had celeberties visit, get interviewed on stage, and put their hand prints in the cement. When I wasd there, the celeberty was Solet Moon Fryy, more famously known as Punky Brewster. She got interviewed on stage, and Disney let kids raise their hands, and then a guy with a microphone would come up to the kids and let them ask questions. I think it would be really cool if I asked something like "I like your adult films a lot. Did you enjoy making them?" I could never ask a question like that though, because my parents were there and they would get mad, and if they didn't the theme park would get mad and might ask us to leave.
So I've been thinking. I want to have kids. Then some day we will be at disney world, and punky brewster will be there, and i will whisper "Hey kid. Ask her about the porno movies she made." Then my kid will ask, and I will pretend to get really mad, and tell him hes not getting any dinner, but I will only be kidding. See the thing is that if it looks like I get mad, then the theme park will leave it up to me to disciplin him. Me and my kid will cause so much trouble, and get a way with it, just by me pretending to be mad. No one will know that in fact it was me who put him up to it. On the way home, we will listen to the sex pistols.
Anyhoo, I never ended up asking punky brewster anything. I was too scared to ask anything.. I tried to get my dad to ask where Brandon (the dog) was, but he said "Why don't you ask?" Hmph.

The first letter this week is fom Kristyn H. of Hootdiggityd,, Og:

hey ben! Are you going to the drafthouse on wed? If
so, do you want an escort(not the hooker kind)? Call
me. Bye.

Kristyn Honea

Dear Krysten,
I've all ready hiered an escourt for myself,, but if you want, I can call them back and tell them to send one for you too. That way, we could double escourt. If you want, we can go to see El Vez tomarrow at Emo's. You know, a few weeks ago, I went to the continental club to see a beatles era legend: Doug Sahm. He is a rock n roller from way back, with a touch of willy nelson. It was to be his big birthday bash concert, witha sleu of special guests. So I got all excited to go see him, and there was a bit of a line out side the club. Well, as it turns out, Doug Sahm actually died a couple years ago!!! This was just a tribute concert, a "hoot night"" as they call it down here. We never have "hoot nights" up north so I didn't know what that ment. But there were some good bands there: The Texas Mavericks were real good, and so were some other band who's name i forgot. But, yeah, lets go see El Vez and go to the Alamo.

You know, its not official, so I'm not going to declare this, but I have been considering declaring my very favorite album. Its hard to declare my favorite album as a compilation of songs that had been released years ago, but I think that the Pulp Fiction may bbe quite an intresting exception. Some one at work recentlly was talking about how its rare that you get an album that every single song is a killer. But the first album that comes to my mind is the pulp ficction sound track, beecause he was right, and to me, pulp fiction is album of killers. That is not a single song on that record that I haven't chosen to listen to just that song before. And even the dialog is killer. I some times am not excited about "Girl,, You'll Be A Woman Soon", but I still like it quite a bit. What a great sound track. I am not ready to make it officiaol,, but if you asked me right now what my favorite record is, I'd probably tell you the pulp fiction sounnd treck. Word. up. !.

Here is a song I''ve been working on:

Let me tell ya bout my pal named hal
ill tell ya hall has one hellovah gal
shes very nice and awfuly sweet
bright red lips and beutiful feet
I took heer home and we had a ball
we made sweet love till the rooser called

we were a lovin all night
just me and her
a night I won't forget
and won't reoccur
that one nigh was what a night
ii remember it when ever there a full moon in sight

well the very next morning
we had breakfast with hal
he had no idea
bout what I'd done with his gal
hhal's gal had a friend
and she arrived that afternoon
and when hal turned his around
we all ran bback to his room

we were a lovin all night
just me and her
a night I won't forget
and won't reoccur
that one nigh was what a night
ii remember it when ever there a full moon in sight

Any hoo, thats it for now. I'm gonna go grocery shopping now and my friend Jenny S. is waiting.

No Witty Comment Tonight,
LAnce Romañce

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