52: Date: Fri, 19 Dec 1997 21:42:27 EST
Subject: Woops!!!

I didn't mean to send that yet. Anyways, here are the letters:

The first letter is from list member Matt R. of gong, show.

Dear Santa,
This year I want grapes, a new car, and a Sasquatch doll.....Woops!
Wrong letter! I'd just like to wish you a happy
holiday/birthday/hannukah/christmas/kwanzaa/new year/st. patricks
day/anniversary/d-day. Whew! I'm sorry you never got a gift from me,
but I have to see you in person in order to give it to you (let your
imagination run wild). Also, I'd like to congratualte you in your
appearence in holllywood, and for taking the art of film-making into
your
own hands. It would give me great delight for me to produce sound
effects, especially for Dave's masturbation scene. Anyway, I'm taking
up
too much time of your's and mine and everybody else who may be reading
this. And, what are your views on Chumbawamba?

XXOOXX
matt

Dear Matt,
Do you still have a beard?? Matt, lets do something some day. Have
your
girl call my girl.
Love,
Ben (tired)

this one is from Megan M of Toyota, Camery:

Ben
I am not sure if this is true where you live but in Virginia all
you have to do is go to the same place you would go to get a driver's
liscense (the Department of Motor Vehicles in Virginia) and show them
proof that you are who you are; birth certificate, social security card
and the like. There may be a small fee, but the ID should work
everywhere that a liscense would except in the case of driving. By the
way I also do not have a liscense or the time or desire to get one. It
is nice to know that there is at least one other person who does not
drive and doesn't really care.
Megan

Dear Megan,
The DMV. I am wondering if fingerprints count as proof?? Those are just
more accessable to me. though the Virgina DMV might be a bit far....
Are the DMV and the DOT the same thing???? Can I get my ID at the
DOT???
I congradulate you on your anti-lisence decision. Thanks.

Love,
Ben

Send me your mail, instructions below.

Well, what album do I recomend this week??? Aerosmith's Big Ones. When
I picked up the best of Aerosmith, which show cased their earlier music,
i was kind of diassapointed with the edits, as all the songs on that
record are edits. Big Ones is theair 2nd best of, covering all their
singles since then, including Rag Dall, Eat The Rich, Jainie's Got A
GUn, Love In An Elevator, (Dude) Looks Like A Lady, Cryin'.... ect.....
All uncut origionals. But, why get this over the albums????? These
songs are great, the best ones from the albums, PLUS it has 2 songs that
weren't on ANY previous albums, PLUS it has the songs that weren't on
aerosmith albiums but were on compilations, like Duces Wild from The
Bevis And Butt-Head Experience, and a live version of (Dude) Looks Like
A
Lady from the Wayne's World 2 soundtrack. I really like this Aerosmix.
Its well worth it. It even has lyrics for ALL the songs.

I want to grow my fingernails long but had no luck, as i have been a
nail
biter/picker since birth, and don't intend to stop. But that keeps my
nails short. So i figured I would grow my toe nails long insted. That
aint workin, i didn't notice that I pick my toe nails too. Oh well,
maybe I will get some press ons.




I thought I would grace you with my college essay. This is my essay I
wrote for my application to the Berklee School Of Music, in Boston, MA.
Here was the asignment. All rights reserved:
<I>
On a seperate page (1,000 words or less), please discribe how you
decided
to pursue a music career. What musical concept(s) or technical
innovation(s) influenced your choice? How would an education at Berklee
College of Music prepare you for your career?
</I>
Ben Garber
I have decided to pursue a career in music because it is the most
dominant area of my life and has been for as long as I can remember. I
have been intrigued by most aspects of music, be it playing, arranging,
writing or just listening. I spend nearly every bit of money I have on
records and concerts, trying to open up my musical awareness as much as
I
possibly can. I enjoy it because it relaxes. Music is a very relaxing
art. It can tense up, it can be funny, it can be angry, it can be sad,
it can be anything. It can be human. It can bring you anywhere it
wants
to, and in the end, you feel may feel relaxed, or pissed off. You feel
different than when you started. That's what music is to me. That's
why
it is the most dominant part of my life and that is why I'd like to be a
musician.
Music has become a part of every person's life. It is impossible for
one person to go through life without ever hearing music. But what
affects people changes from culture to culture, or from person to
person.
Hundreds of billions of people have their own music collections. They
get what they like. Often times, families tend to share a video
collection, or art work, or most anything. Music, however, has become a
more private collection. Commonly, people have similar taste in
movies.
Generally, when a movie is a hit, if you ask people what they thought
about it, most people will say they loved it. However, when you ask
people what they think of this week's number one single, you will get
very mixed reviews. The whole family might go out to see Forest Gump
together, but most of the family probably will not be attending the
Green
Day concert. With music, everyone likes different things. There is a
wider range of musical taste. And music branches out into millions of
different formats. It is very diverse. Jerry Garcia once described
music
as being like infinite space. It goes on forever, and you can keep on
exploring and you will never find an end to it.
I like music because it is so powerful, so endless. That's why I
would
love to pursue a career in the field of music. There is no other field
that I would be happier with. I would like to get a job in music
because
it would allow me to explore. And maybe someday I will make an amazing
discovery.
I would like to get a career in music education. More specifically, I
would like to teach jazz classes at schools. It would be a reliable,
stable and enjoyable career to pursue (especially with more and more
schools starting to incorporate jazz into their curriculum). This
would
give me great influence on the people I teach. I get to introduce them
to music they have never heard. I could show them music that totally
changes the way they listen to music, how they play music, or maybe even
change the way they think about things in general. It's all possible,
and it happens. Twenty years from now, I could bring a Louis Armstrong
recording into my jazz class. Twenty years from now, the youth might
not
even know who Louis Armstrong is. Then they hear these old treasures,
and say "Wow! This is the greatest music I have ever heard!!! " Or
better yet, they'll say "Wow! I want to play trumpet like that!!" And
here they are, introduced to music they never knew existed. And who
knows what this music could do for them. I use the example of a young
drummer named Alex Rose. His freshman year of high school, he took a
school jazz class, though he knew little about jazz. His teacher took
the class to a professional jazz concert, and Alex sat in amazement.
"Wow," he said, "I want to play jazz!" I get to help the kids explore,
and maybe they will make an amazing discovery. And to know I was an
influence on these kids would be a great feeling.
A great thing about teaching jazz class, is that not only do I get to
show them new music, they get to show me new music. It will keep me
from
losing touch with modern music. I may find some great music that I
would
never have found if my students hadn't introduced me. I also may hear a
fantastic student play some of the greatest piano solos I've ever heard.
You never know what kind of talent, or potential, you may find in a high
school jazz band. Not only do I get to teach kids, but at the same
time I can continue my own education. They teach me as well.
My plan is to get a degree in music education, then find a teaching
position soon afterwards. Through all of this, I also plan on using my
playing ability to play my own music. I feel that Berklee would be an
excellent place to go because it would allow me to get a degree in music
education, and become a better player at the same time. I spent 5 weeks
at Berklee this past summer and learned quite a bit. I have seen many
students, alumnae and teachers play and have been very impressed by
their
musicianship and musical ability. Most of my music teachers have
attended Berklee. It is seeing them at work that has inspired me to
want
to join them, and become a music teacher as well. I feel the best place
to pursue my goal would be Berklee College of Music -- the same place
that they did.


for your information, it is 960 words.


any ways, good night, i'm a tired bum.

Love,
Your flopsy pal,
Ben


Thank you for reading this issue of tha Lance Romañce Mailing List. To subscribe, send an email to tendonitus@giantrats.com with the word "Subside" in the subject. For back issues, and just more entertainment, visit www.GiantRats.com.
---------------------------------------------
comercial use or mass emails using the names and/or email addresses of subscribers to this mailing list is strictly forbidden
---------------------------------------------
©1997 Lance Romañce All Rights Reserved
this mailing is anti-dave mathews
email: tendonitus@giantrats.com
website: http://www.giantrats.com